Two Loaves and a Half a Fish

Hi Friends.

I am sitting right now in a hotel room in Denver while Matt and the kids enjoy the pool.  It’s 10 in the morning and in about six hours we begin the travel to Chiang Mai, Thailand.  We leave here around 3 in the afternoon and will arrive in Thailand (hopefully) about 32 hours later.  And, honestly, we are tired.

We sat at breakfast this morning, and I was telling Matt about how I wished we had scheduled a week-long vacation before we boarded the plane.  I guess neither of us realized the mental stress, physical work and emotional energy it would take to pack our home and say goodbye to a home and a community.   It’s been an unbelievably exhausting month.  And since I have been remiss in taking the time to blog much about it, here are some verbal snapshots (I’ll try to load pictures later):

Luggage.  Perhaps the single most frustrating task before us was deciding what to bring with us.  We packed and repacked and dumped it all on the floor and packed again–with a few extra suitcases we bought at Goodwill.  Eventually, we ended up with 6 bags to take with us and several for a team to bring in a few months.

Goodbyes. Were harder than I imagined.  From my sisters to our parents to the youth at the church to our amazing friends here in Woodland, we have cried many tears over the past few weeks (me, in particular).  Last week my friends who meet on Wednesdays threw me a luncheon complete with a book they had  created for me, which was such a gift to my heart.  And, then this past Sunday our church family blessed us beyond expectation with a send-off that would have brought Hulk Hogan to tears.  Videos, highlights of our time here in Colorado, sharing.  It was an incredibly honoring night, and made us realize again the richness of this Community we are leaving.  [Thank you WPCC.  Truly. ]

Kids. Are doing okay.  They are glad to be swimming right now and are tired of watching cartoons while their parents furiously pack.  They say they are excited to be moving to Thailand (mostly), and we are grateful for the innocence (and blissful ignorance) of their ages right now.

House. Cleaned and ready for the renters.  Many hands helped to make it happen, from hauling trash to fixing water heaters to mopping floors to babysitting–thank you to those who labored in love with us that way (especially my sister, Cassie).  We were grateful to have spent the last two days with our dear friends the Hamm’s, which was fun for the kids (and for us!) and was nice to be able to clean without little hands and feet around to play (and, thus, get it dirty again).

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And, so, after an entire month of transition, there we sat this morning over coffee. Tired and Empty.  And I tell Matt how I don’t think I have it in me to start this journey now– to be a good mom over this marathon traveling day and to engage well when we get off the plane.  And he listens, and he understands.  And then he reminds me of when Jesus took the little boy’s lunch of five loaves and two fish, and how the Messiah blessed and broke the offering, and then miraculously multiplied it to feed thousands.  And Matt says laughingly, “Maybe we just have two loaves and a half a fish, but we have to believe God can use that today.”

Two loaves and a half a fish.

Honestly, that is all I feel like I have in this moment.  But I realize that I have a choice with what to do with that little lunch I do possess.  I can cling it to me in the belief that it will never be enough. Or I can move forward in hope that my Jesus can take my little itty bit and break it and feed thousands–or more specifically, be more like Him today, in the airport, on a plane, and eventually stepping off into the heat of Thailand.

And I choose to be like that little boy on a hillside–to offer up my “not enough” and

hope and

believe that Jesus can do much with a humble little.

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Thank you for reading and journeying with our family.  We are going to try to do a video post here in the hotel later today.   We would treasure your prayers for renewed connection as a family, patience and good attitudes while traveling, for the kids to sleep on the plane, and for an excitement at the adventure Jesus has called us into.

More later, promise.

Tagged as: bible, inspirational, jesus, moving overseas, thailand